There it is.

The worst weekend in history.

Arsenal v Everton 1 to score over 1,5 Everton didn't muster a single shot on target in their last 2 games yet somehow managed to lose only 1:0 on both occassions. Lucky.

Norwich v Newcastle 1 either at halftime or fulltime

Liverpool v QPR X either at halftime or fulltime

Manchester United v Wolverhampton 1 and under 3,5 combined goals scored

Swansea v Fulham X Fulham missed a penalty just to go 2 down moments later in the dying minutes of the game. Sweet.

WBA v Wigan 1 Wigan haven't won 2 games in a row in the EPL since 2006. Cheers, Martinez.

Sunderland v Blackburn 1 a stopagge time winner for Sunderland, close one...Martin O'Neill having an instant impact?

Chelsea v Manchester City both teams to score

Inter v Fiorentina X either at halftime or fulltime

Palermo v Cesena 1 shocker

Atalanta v Catania German Denis to score at any time

Udinese v Chievo Antonio di Natale to score at any time

Novara v Napoli 2 to score over 1,5

Roma v Juventus both teams to score

FC Koeln v Freiburg 1 to score over 1,5

Mainz v Hamburg X at either halftime or fulltime

Borussia Dortmund v Kaiserslautern 1 to score in both halves watseful Dortmund, beautiful goal by K'lautern.

FC Twente v NEC Nijmegen over 2,5 goals

AZ Alkmaar v De Graafschap 1

Excelsior v Heerenveen 2

PSV v NAC Breda 1 to score over 1,5

VVV Venlo v Roda Kerkrade 2 Venlo: 1 win in 15 games thus far, goal difference on -26. Best time to get a breakthrough result? Against an in-form Roda team (3 wins on the trot) who have also helped by getting their goalkeeper sent off and missing a penalty at 1:0 to Venlo. FML.

FC Utrecht v Feyenoord both teams to score

Celtic v Hibernian 1 to score in both halves

St. Johnstone v Motherwell X at either halftime or fulltime

Podbeskidzie v GKS Bełchatów 1 either at halftime or fulltime

Ruch Chorzów v Korona Kielce 1 and under 3,5 combined goals scored

Legia Warszawa v Cracovia Kraków 1/1 absymal display from Legia, toothless upfront and lucky in the back.

ŁKS Łódź v Śląsk Wrocław 2 another injury time winner, they really are trying to give me a heart attack.

Lechia Gdańsk v Jagielonnia Białystok under 2,5 goals

AA Gent v Germinal Beerschot 1 yet another shocker.

Club Brugge v Sint-Truiden 1

Sporting Lisbon v Nacional 1 and under 3,5 combined goals scored

Rennes v Brest both teams to score

Sochaux v PSG over 2,5 goals should I take comfort in the fact PSG were 'absolutely dominant' in that game?

AS Nancy v Ajaccio 1

Valenciennes v Montpellier X2

Marseille v Bordeaux 1 so without an incentive (like progressing through a Champions League group, for instance) Deschamps' side is painfully average.

Lille v Dijon both teams to score

Real Betis v Valencia (10.12, 19:00) both teams to score (1.80)

Real Madrid v Barcelona 1 you really have to feel for Mourinho; he plays defensively – Barcelona beats him comfortably. He opts for a more attacking formation and presses Guardiola's team – his big guns don't turn up and he's on the losing end again.

Athletic Bilbao v Racing Santander 1 there is nothing more frustrating than the checking Livescore and seeing the result you want just to refresh the page, the green blinking light on the left hand side now gone, and the result changed. For fuck's sake.